Coach Carter
I write this post 📨 to you an inspired
man, filled with hope that this will also find that inspiration within in you, liberate
it and let it shine...
Early this year I wrote about using whatever technological
device (laptop/cell phone/TV) to its optimal capacity and to improve yourself. I
gave a few examples how that could be implemented, but then I seemed like the “do
as I say” guy as I did not give a personal example. Well, here is an example
from my life.
I love movies, I watch them all the time and I watch all
kinds. One would never expect that you can extract rich life lessons from them,
but you can, you just have to listen.
When I work up on Saturday morning I brushed my teeth and
made a huge ass mug of tea. I had no agenda for the day so I decided to watch a
movie, I randomly chose "Coach Carter", and I surprisingly enjoyed
movie, as if I was not repeating it. I was so inspired by the movie that I decided
to watch it again, the second time I was watching it I took some notes for you,
yes you, just to awaken that super inspiration buried deep inside you. These
are a just words now, no magic or muthi involved, but I know you gonna make something
of them. Here they are, in no particular order the lessons from the movie:
1. Growing up
Part of growing up is making decisions and facing the
consequences...
When you were a kid, everything you did reflected “bad” on
your parents, in Xhosa people would even say “umnta ka bani” meaning “so and so’s
child”. Now when you all grown up, it’s all you, you f*ck up, it’s on your name,
your reputation.
With the above in mind, you must always ask yourself what do
YOU want when making a decision, it doesn’t hurt to be selfish sometimes. For example,
if you are in a bad relationship and you don’t see a future with that person,
take the decision, tell them, don’t think about what your friends and family
will say, or that you will hurt your partner’s feelings, end things, don’t waste
anymore of each other’s time.
NB: I am not saying be inhumanly-selfish, for example if you
want to pee in a bus/taxi, please don’t, just don’t.
2. Demons and Haters
Haters are everywhere, you can't change that, please don't
waste your energy trying to. Here is a tip, when your haters are after you:
RUN!!! You run buddy, you don't stop, you keep running, don’t you dare get
tired, No no no, you run until they are tired, wear their asses off. That's why
I suggest you jog every morning, so that you are prepared for this activity and
they’re not when it’s time, if you out run them, they’ll find new people to
bother, as you do not entertain their childishness.
I know we have been told over the years to stand and face
our demons, but some demos hit the gym and come to you prepared, then they tear
you apart. We are not all ‘strong people’, strong people face their demons and
some of us just have to run. That is why we still have suicides in our
communities, weak people get into fist fights with buffed up demons, bring
knives to gun fights. But that is not always the case, sometimes people imagine
“facing their fears”, they imagine the fight, and in that imaginary story-line,
they imagine their demons more powerful than they are, which is not always the
case, some demons take chances.
Strong people, face your demons and then the rest, do like I
do, RUN!!!
Just do it like the youth of Mthata does it, when they fail
grade 12, the RUN to Dutywa to re-write their matric, they pass and go to
university, then they come back to Mthatha.
3. Friends
Have the kind of friends that you can call your TEAM, one
person triumphs, you all triumph. An environment where jealousy has no room. If
one of you falls, the rest will pick that one up, enjoying one another's falls
must fall... and gentlemen, am not only talking to the ladies.
If you want to test your “team”, here is a tip: If something
bad happens to you, you should want to tell your friends and not be worried about
what they will say and think when they find out. You must feel this way because
you know you got the genuine support. And please, accept positive criticism,
your relationship can’t all be rainbows and unicorns.
4. Vision
The first step to being someone in life, is to have a
vision, YOUR vision. Think about it this way, a blind man can't drive a car
while someone shouts from outside where he should turn left or stop, that’s a recipe
for disaster. The person driving must see things for what they are and manoeuvre
the motor vehicles accordingly, and also taking into consideration the rules of
the road. So take the car as your life and take it where YOU want it to be, I
hope you not the blind man. And yes, there are basic rules to life, e.g you can’t
walk around naked, can’t walk around beating/spitting at people, basic things
like that, your life must not inconvenience your fellow humans. So, have YOUR
vision... See it, Believe it, Now get to it…
5. Choices
You must always think about the choice you are making before
acting... Screw spontaneity, just pause a bit, and let it play out in your head,
both the good and the bad, your “preferred”
scenario vs “worst case” scenario. And
“take an educated guess/risk” as my
lecturer would put it. You'll be surprized at how evenly it will balance out in
you head and you will "see the future".
Let's say you were to use a small pond as a mirror to apply
your make up, remember when water is agitated, you cannot see your reflection
properly, so wait for the water to be still before you apply your lip stick for
things to work out in your favour. Don't make spontaneous life decisions,
please. Chill and think a lil, then do it...
6. Battles
Teenagers have to understand that their parents can fight
their battle up to a certain stage. At some point a person has to step up and
take charge of their own lives. For most of us that is when we go to
university, and yes, most of us, because I have seen working young adults that
get monthly allowances from their parents even though they have their own
monthly salaries. Yes I know, it’s unfair, but quit reading into other people’s
stories and write your own.
Life is a book, and your thoughts, visions and & actions
are the pen, yes the pen does run dry, shake and roll it, it may go on a few
pages, but when its dry, borrow A PEN from the next person so you can continue
writing your story, not their book to read off their notes, you’ll just cause
pain for your heart.
7. Decisions
If you make a decision, I repeat, if YOU make a decision,
respect it. A decision that is free from friends & family influence. When
you done respecting it, stand by it. Fight for it, not because you are afraid
of what so and so will say, but because you heart feels it’s right and the
harvest you will reap at the end will make YOU a very happy person, the person YOU
want to be.
People have to be start being a lil bit selfish when it
comes to their lives, their happiness has to come first once in a while. I have
seen too many teen-age boys (men) & girls live "fake lives", and
unfortunately some adults, it’s even worse for adults, because debt is involved.
People should not be afraid of being extraordinary, of being unique. Make yourself
special...
It was said that:
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
If you think you deserve something or to be somewhere, then
think like it, act like it. Don't whine about it... Just because you deserve
something doesn't mean “life” will hand it to you on a silver platter, unless
you have a rich daddy (which ever "daddy")...
And that's it, all that from one movie... Am sorry I made
you read all that… For more life lessons, watch “Kung-Fu Panda” the very
first one, it’s amazing. When you’re done, just drop a comment on what you
leant.
-M. Hlazo
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